Forgiveness seems like it should be something that comes naturally and yet it doesn’t. Being human means being hurt. Every human can be mean. Even if we love somebody, there is an old adage, that says, “you always hurt the ones you love”. We hurt our relationship with others and our relationship with our Savior; since we hurt one of His.
It is our impulsive, impatient nature that may just cause us to speak without thinking. We think we know the best course and in this ME world, we feel, “We deserve things ASAP.” God does know the plans He has for us.
Hearing my elder kids share with the younger, “Don’t be in a hurry to be an adult, it is hard, I wish I had mom and dad to handle my stuff. Paying bills, having a time schedule, managing money and all, is hard, Dude!” I smile as I walk past this serious discussion.
Our impatience is pride, we want control, plain and simple. In the end, we may get what we want but what is the cost. We end up feeling sad and discontent.
God placed us in our families for a purpose to be grown and trimmed of character flaws, ouch:), and loved, hopefully; loved, and taught the wisdom of God.
Sometimes, our parents may fail us because of their own space of brokenness. They may live in fear, not know Jesus, respond from fear to anger. Their fear, or perhaps a previous experience of trauma, may lead to words that are expressed not in the manner needed. I have heard it said, Fear is the precursor to most anger.
Even if we were not raised with the knowledge of God, the Bible, and the importance to forgive, we still have to unload the bitterness that unforgiveness can bring to our life. We may not forget anothers’ hurt but we have to let God handle it. If we do not let go and Let God, we fill our minds with more junk.
God wants us to forgive each other, start a new day, and meditate on the word of God. There’s a scripture in Proverbs, it says a gentle answer turns away wrath, great wisdom.
Proverbs 15:1 - 2 1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. 2 The tongue of the wise adorns knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly.
It is important to respond gently, especially to those that may be hurting. We may need to walk away and gather our thoughts. We all disappoint each other. It’s the enemy that keeps speaking lies and doubts to our mind such as we are unworthy or that others are judging us.
We have to get our truth from Jesus Christ himself. That may mean putting post-it notes or index cards with scriptures of wisdom on your mirror, on the car visor, in your kitchen. I need to be reminded to change my reactions. Maybe this advice will help break the patterns of conflict in your home.
Zephaniah 3:17 reminds us the Lord delights in us. Ephesians 2:10 says we’re God‘s workmanship created in Christ for things He planned long ago. The enemy wants to talk slime and make us believe we will never achieve the goals He has set.
When we hear negative thoughts spewed by people around us; “you will never succeed, supposed to be perfect, you will never find love.” We may need to disconnect from those who spew junk. Sometimes the past seems to haunt our mind, and we are just stuck in the negative.
We have to pause and consider where is that stupid comment coming from?
Is it really what my parents or my family have said? Or is it just the false statements that come from a past hurt or the enemy? We can choose to flush those things out of our brains. We have to make space in our heads, dump the lies and fill our minds with the truth.
Romans 12:2 NLT Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.
If we continue to fester on the lies of the enemy then we don’t have enough space in our brain to think the true thoughts. It is time to clear out the lies in our mind, words spoken in anger by others, mean, jealous comments. Dump the junk! Let the truth of God, let His words encourage, comfort, and prompt your life to your purpose.
God’s Truths: I am God’s chosen one. I am a child of God. I’m worthy because He calls me worthy. He will direct my path if I let Him lead. He has great things in store for me. I need to be patient and allow Him to speak the truth and I need to listen. He will never ever forsake me, I can trust God!