We can make our own plans, but the LORD gives the right answer.
Our way may not be the best way, however, being human means to learn the process of seeking wisdom. This is a life long process, to stop being a toddler stamping feet, screaming “No, I can do it myself!” Instead, we must stop and take deep breaths, count to ten as we tell our kids and pause. The Lord will give a better Word and the best directions.
The fruits of the Spirit( Christs’ character traits) are: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness, goodness, and self control. They are found in Galatians 5.
Galatians 5:22-26 AMP
But the fruit of the Spirit [the result of His presence within us] is love [unselfish concern for others], joy, [inner] peace, patience [not the ability to wait, but how we act while waiting], kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness, self-control. Against such things there is no law.  And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature together with its passions and appetites.  If we [claim to] live by the [Holy] Spirit, we must also walk by the Spirit [with personal integrity, godly character, and moral courage-our conduct empowered by the Holy Spirit].  We must not become conceited, challenging or provoking one another, envying one another.
Pride, challenging provocation to debate or even fight and jealousy are tools the devil uses to divide us. A Follower of Christ should be able to speak for injustice after they filter their response with Godly wisdom. We are all created in the Image of God. The devil hates us. He will insight us to hate each other. But God is love.
The Holy Spirit and our commitment to walk with Him are the keys to gaining impulse control and showing the character traits of Him to those lives we intersect. Personal integrity and moral courage do not come by our strength. Love isn’t always easy.
As a child of God I am able to see situations where I need extra help to respond as Jesus, He and His warring angels are my rear guard. I don’t have to be led as people pleaser but instead as a child covered by Jesus. New perspectives and responses can abound in better communication.
As we strive to make changes in our responses, words and actions, we can expect plenty of experiences that challenge our success to change and grow more like Jesus.
However, I remind my kids and myself, God is not finished with us yet. Everyday, we get a chance to reconnect to our Savior Jesus and recommit to letting His plan for our life to unfold. Seeking accountability from likeminded women and men can keep us growing in faith and character.
So take a deep breath, say “Jesus I need you, mold me and make me into who and what You know I can be. Thank you for loving me and dying for my sins, forgive me for my sins, and I want Your best for my life. Guide and teach me, in the precious Name above all Names, Jesus,”
Someone asked me once as they observed my increased gray hair, “will you color it or keep it real.” I replied,”Every gray hair is a reminder to me of a life lived and when I found this scripture it confirmed my emotion,” I hope it resonates with you. May we all reflect more Jesus and less of ourselves.
Proverbs 16: 31-33 31] Gray hair is a crown of glory; it is gained by living a godly life.  Better to be patient than powerful; better to have self-control than to conquer a city.  We may throw the dice, but the LORD determines how they fall.