Dementia – Reflections

Dementia is a stealer of the memories and relationships of many. It is watching fine-lined cracks form in the mind of someone you love. It could be a Dad, Mom, a Grandparent, or another significant family member. As a family member, you try to plug the breaks in their mind. You may research possible nutritional supplements. You encourage your loved one to seek medical, emotional, and spiritual help. However, they are adults, and you are limited by their need to be in charge as they are afraid and confused. It is a walk of strength and courage. It is remembering the vision of those we love from decades past.

Love stands solid when we can reflect on the character traits of a relative pre Dementia. We can push away the sadness, the hopeless future relationship, and instead, hold onto the love and compassion we knew. We can share the love through words and actions, share great family memories, spend time with them and pray for wisdom from God.

I think it was a gift from God, as I cleared out my closet, I found the words penned for my Mom. It was a gift that I share with you now, treasure the relationships around you. When we can share love despite the changed mind, and grace to those who invested in our lives, we reflect on Jesus.

Ephesians 6:1 -3    Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord,[a] for this is the right thing to do. “Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise: 3 If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.”

Treasured poem from 30 years past on my Mom:

This is a poem to my mother,

whom I love so much,

Her lightly salted grey hair

the perfect seasoning to her face

with fine lines of life

at her eyes and at her mouth

from many years of life

both happy and sad experiences.

Her stature is just shy of mine.

But she dresses in a style-

a style that exudes Mom.

Her care and concern for me

something I can always trust.

She is talkative and friendly

although sometimes too much-

she means well with others

Family and friends mean a bunch.

She busies herself in so many ways

concern over things she may never change.

She’s a hard worker, the glue in the family, serves all.

She never tries to be, anything

but the Mom I see

There is no falseness in this lady

as she will state to many-

“Take me as I am or not at all.”

You should already know how proud,

How proud of you I am

For being such a gentle mother, and

of whom this poem speaks so grand.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

May this reflection draw you to encourage the parent, guardian, grandparent, or significant person in your life. I have been blessed with elder women who have encouraged me as I process my Mom and Dementia.

If you didn’t have a Godly example of Mom or Dad or supportive person, I pray that God will lead you to one of His chosen people. God bless you, You are loved!!

 1 Timothy 5:4     But if she has children or grandchildren, their first responsibility is to show godliness at home and repay their parents by taking care of them. This is something that pleases God.

Steps to the Heart

Understanding that we can not do life alone is not a weakness. When we reach out to the Creator God, He will strengthen our mind, body, and soul. He awaits our voice. The Shephard knows His Sheep. We need His help. Our hearts need repair.

My pastor shared the ABCD Steps of Faith, they really helped me to visualize my individual steps. I needed to consider where I need to make changes.

ABCD Steps of Faith:

As it is written in the Bible, we are called to seek Him in His Word,

Believe He is who He says He is, even if we have doubt we still must stand firm.

Call out our sin and ask Jesus forgiveness, also, Call His scriptures as truth until we can fully walk in faith. (Faith is not something we may visualize as evident, it is deep in the soul commitment.)

The next step is to Do what He calls you to do. Take the steps He calls you to, if it is His plan, He will see you to it.

1, There are many people standing firm in their faith in Jesus that are being persecuted across the world. We must pray for their deliverance to the shelter of the Almighty God.

2. We must pray for others, praise the Lord even if times can be dark. He is the Light in the darkness.

3. When we see a need, we must intercede. Help each other as Jesus is our helper.

4. Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straigh
t.

5. Faith over fear is the answer. Be strong with Jesus Christ. He will give you courage.

Deuteronomy 31:6  So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.”

Praising the Lord deepens our heartstrings to His. He created us. He wants us to draw into a relationship with Him (The Triune: God, the Father, Jesus, His Son, and the Holy Spirit)

Heartstrings by MM

It is a free will choice, not a demand. He started with Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. They broke the human relationship when they ate the apple of the Tree of Wisdom. It is the orginal sin. The snake (the devil) tempted the couple to choose more wisdom than God. The same is true today, we are all tempted by something.

Jesus is the answer the bridge for our relationship with God. He took on all of our sin. He loves His children. He was a living sacrifice.

We must make an individual choice for Jesus. He wants to hold your hand and be on your journey. Let His Peace, His Wisdom, His plan unfold in your life as you seek Him. Consider reading Hebrews 10. It may answer some of your questions.

Zach Williams, a Christian music artist has many awesome songs with messages of transformation, forgiveness, turning to Jesus, learning from your past mistakes. Heaven Help Me really spoke to my soul this week. In humility, Jesus is the only One who can truly help and guide any of His people.

We do not have to be perfect before we take the steps to Jesus. He is the only one who is perfect. Let the lyrics flow over you and seek Jesus. Let Him give you the words as you submit to His authority. He will help you. You are not alone.

If any of the songs I have posted have been a help to you, please let me know. May the praise of the Lord bring hope and encouragement.

Hebrews 10: 19 - 25 Therefore, brothers and sisters, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, 20 by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, 21 and since we have a great priest over the house of God, 22 let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. 23 Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. 24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

Sun and Shield

Photo by Sachin C Nair on Pexels.com

Psalm 84:11 NLT
For the LORD God is our sun and our shield. He gives us grace and glory. The LORD will withhold no good thing from those who do what is right.

Are you feeling unsettled? Are you wondering if there is a God? Are you wondering if He hears your prayers, moments of despair, or your requests? We all have days, maybe weeks or years of questioning? Does He see me?

Sometimes our requests are answered quickly, sometimes it feels like silence and no answers and sometimes it’s “my child, I love you and wait”!

I am learning God can be working behind the scenes and in my hurry to a conclusion I am sooooo impatient. Isn’t self control a fruit of the Spirit? Galatians 5 is a gold mine of instruction.

Galatians 5:22-26 NLT
[22] But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, [23] gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things! [24] Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. [25] Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives. [26] Let us not become conceited, or provoke one another, or be jealous of one another.

If you aren’t feeling God answering your prayers, maybe what you think is for you is not a good thing.

He would never withold His best from you. Maybe His timing is not now or ever. He can be trusted. Remember He knows the number of your days and holds you in the palm of His hand.

Psalm 139:16-18 NLT
[16] You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. [17] How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! [18] I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!

Isaiah 49:15-16 NLT
[15] “Never! Can a mother forget her nursing child? Can she feel no love for the child she has borne? But even if that were possible, I would not forget you! [16] See, I have written your name on the palms of my hands. Always in my mind is a picture of Jerusalem’s walls in ruins.

I have been feeling the need for the Word of God intensify. His words are nuggets of gold. They are not just words on a page but wisdom from above. It doesn’t matter if you were born in times past or present.

I used to think the Bible was filled with stories unrelateable but the more I read and meditate on His Word, the more I see our human nature doesn’t change very much over generations. Sadly, we are a mess without our Savior.

The human race tends toward its own sin nature: selfishness, wanting our own way, pride, jealousy, survival of the fittest, and me me me. I see these traits in myself and I cringe.

This mindset causes conflict leading to unrest, leading to fear, anxiety, depression and maybe war.

Look at the state of our world, our state, our community, maybe even our homes at times. We can be the bearer of unrest and conflict or choose,instead, to be a person who speaks life, pauses to bring words of affirmation, sprinkled with discipline in love, forgiveness and prayer over destructive communication.

It always boils down to choice. I choose peace not victimhood. Love in truth over fear and avoidance.

When I have spoken in fear or anger, I am learning to repent and turn back to Gods ways. It isn’t easy to break habits but it must be done. I must cast aside sins to break generational cycles.

Cast all cares upon Him for He cares for you. 1 Peter 4

What about you? Be the voice in the wilderness filtering your speech after mediating on the word of God. His love is unfailing, He is our strength.

Psalm 117: 1 – 2 1 Praise the Lord, all you nations. Praise him, all you people of the earth. 2 For his unfailing love for us is powerful; the Lord’s faithfulness endures forever. Praise the Lord!

Healing

Photo by Hernan Pauccara on Pexels.com

Families are formed in many ways; single parents, grandparents, stepparents, moms and dads, and birth families, along with parents blessed through adoption. I fall into the last family group although it is not the last option. The heart beats of mothers who yearn for a child encompasses each of these family groups.

After praying a decade to have a child, God truly gave the gift of love through adoption to my husband and I almost twenty five years ago. We chose to have letters and in person contact (open adoption) with our childrens’ birth parents and family.

On this journey, I was humbled to develop close relationships with the birth families of our children. The media and many in community do not understand the love and sacrifice that it takes for a birthmother (and birthfather) to place their child out of love into the home of another Mom and Dad.

In addition, I have been blessed by contact with other birthparents/birth families. I have cried, grieved, prayed and rejoiced over the birth-families who shared their stories with me. Their willingness to allow my personal questions has allowed me to bring an open window to their hard but loving decision. It is with their input that I was called by God to write an E-book, “Healing Through Sacrifice”.

I decided to release ” Healing through Sacrifice: Bible Study for Birth mothers and Families” as a free E-book on my blog. The wisdom comes from a combination of personal and community experience.

Thank you to Temi from Christian Mommas for helping me with illustrations and providing your wisdom with formatting in WordPress. What a gift you are to me!

Please, consider visiting my free resources page to download a copy for someone who may need this resource. God bless you!

Numbers 6:24-26
 ‘May the Lord bless you and protect you.
 May the Lord smile on you and be gracious to you.
 May the Lord show you his favor and give you his peace.’